The Most Expensive Thing in the World

I seldom make wishes, not even on birthdays. Wishes are only for kids blowing their birthday cake. But at times when i feel all hope is gone, i do make wishes and today is no exception.

A month after returning, i should have landed a job by now. Well, i did actually, but i quit even before i started. I have applied with several companies and though all of them have made favorable responses, its me who chose not to give confirmation for interviews. Coca Cola hired me for a decent package but i backed out even before my first day commenced. I feel I wouldnt be doing the right thing. Yes, i need a job but i dont want to jeopardize somebidy else just because i want a temporary placement. Soon i will be back to Dubai and i dont want Coke to fill the gap between now and the time that i need to get back. I would be very sorry if i do that. At least now, they would have that chance to invest with someone who would be willing to stay for more thatn two months.

Honestly, i dont know how to feel right now. I am confuzed and i feel that i am a total wreck. I need a job but i let go of it. Just the same, i have eliminated a potential guilt ridden act and its quite releiving somehow. i am close to being broke and i dont seem to care. When i am going to bed, i am thinking what movies to watch and what clothes to wear. Hey man! there's a huge problem to solve and i have given up I am just waiting for heaven to fall. I need stability deep within. As i write thsi blog, i wish for peace of mind and solace of thoughts.

I was targetting a call center job but i would always screwed it up for one reason or another. Either they would asked me to take long wait which of course falls into the catedory of things i amnot able to do or setting up a scheduled time which is inconvinient to me. Ridiculous isnt it? But its just the way i am. Like i always say, i ahev yet to meet my counterpart and until then i wont be able to achieve that elusive peace of mind.

I was in Makati the other day when the Glorietta blasts occurred. I was one of the first who have heard about the incident and the casualties involved. Being a socially mindless and carefree person, it is rare instance that i feel sorry for what has happened. I have my own personal troubles and i feel sad, and i know how much more it meant to those people affected when the trouble has taken a much greater scale. The Glorietta blast has claimed 11 lives and left hundred others injured. I personally condemned this treacherous act, be it an intentional terrorism activity or a simply an industrial failure in the buildings basement facilities. I pray to spare the lives of innocent people being dragged in this issue of negligence or whatever the people behind this plot is fighting for. The civilians have nothing to do with it. What we want is peace, not war and indiscrimate killings.

I have often been asked what for me is the most expensive thing in the world. Without second thought id say its peace. Peace is the most expensive thing in the world. Its something that doesnt just happen overnight and no amount of wealth could afford you to have it. Peace begins in one self and is founded on being happy for all that you are and being grateful for all that you have Pace is freedom form worries and anxiety and its something that i wish i have right now. I also wish for peace through out the world. Freedom from oppression, from war, from violence and from misunderstanding. I know it would take amillion years to achieve genuine peace but if we start within ourselves, we bring it less close to impossible.